Two sad events yesterday.
First, I received a bile filled text from someone, calculated to cut to the heart of my insecurities about myself. Intellectually I realised that the sender of this message was more exposing their inability to manage their life, insecurities and depression but my initial reaction was breathtakingly negative. Then I recovered my composure, went out and had coffee with one friend, a glass of wine with another friend, sent some love out into the universe in the form of an inspirational quote and cooked delicious dinner for one of my beloved closest confidants and her little family. I pushed through a core workout this morning before brunch with another friend – damn I am so lucky!!! I live in a beautiful city, in a lovely home with my babies, have an active social life and a job that pays more that just meeting the bills.
Later on in the day yesterday the 300 metre roll of GladWrap I bought when Costco opened in 2009 finally ran out. I sent a text to Jeremy about both the text and the GladWrap, he is currently at Confurgence (google it, its an amazing convention) and due back on Monday. In our text exchange it was evident that I was a bit sadder about the GladWrap than I was about the text. That roll of GladWrap moved into the Princess Palace with us, it had wrapped up countless muffins, portions of meat, leftover fritata, fondant icing and so many other culinary delights. The new roll (which has been patiently waiting in the cupboard for six months) looks a little bright and brash but no doubt will serve us well for the next five or so years.
When you are the parent of a transgender child you do cop a lot of negativity. People are uncomfortable about your child and what they represent. The norms that you apply to yourself and your childhood suddenly don’t apply to a transgender child. The milestones of childhood and adolescence are different in some ways but reassuringly similar in others. I have worked hard in the last twelve months to develop the resilience that I will need this year to support the next stage of Jeremy’s journey. I give no one permission to take that resilience away from me, nor permission to dim the joy that I experience in life, or to foist a poor value system on me that is contrary to my beliefs.
Jeremy deserves nothing but the best, to be surrounded by loving friends, family and cohort of peers. The haters can hate but our love is like a shield of steel.